Utilisateur:InProgress/Same-sex attraction : Différence entre versions

Version du 7 février 2010 à 23:16

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,^[1] commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the Church, and affirm them as good people. We seek to help them and advocate their cause. We seek to bring them peace, and empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, including the decision to abstain from same-sex relationships

The Church welcomes gay people

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." ^[2]

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."^[3]

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." ^[4]

Many gays and lesbians are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members:

• Evergreen International
• North Star
• Northern Lights

LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.^[5] Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign^[6], and in Deseret Book.^[7] General Authorities attend these meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.^[8]

The Church welcomes gay people, and gay people have responded by joining the Church.

The Church affirms gay people

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards gay people, President Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."^[9] President Hinckley has followed suit and repeated his love for gay people,^[10] and has affirmed that the gay members of the Church are good people.^[11]

This affirmation of gay people has also been extended to gay people who do not keep the standards of the Church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."^[12]

The Church always strives to affirm gay people in our love for them, and in their value as human beings. Elder Holland recounts a story of a gay man who came to him with a question. The man worried that because he was gay, he couldn't continue being a member of the Church. Elder Holland reiterated his love for this gay man affirmed that being gay did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. After recounting the story, he tells of another man with same-sex attractions who was faithful in the Church. Of him, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." ^[13]

The Church has instructed leaders of the Church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."^[14]

The Church helps gay people

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."^[15] Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks by saying "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." ^[16]

There are many ways in which the Church helps the gay population. For example, the Church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".^[17] Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.^[18] This was done even though the Utah legislature was against these rights.

Beyond advocating legal protections for gay people, the Church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."^[19]

The Church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.^[20] The leadership has warned against aversive therapies that have been used on gay people which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.^[21] They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,^[22] and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.^[23] They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin^[24] and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.^[25]

The Church helps family members of gay people

One of the best services that we can perform for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. One way to accomplish this is by supporting their families. We should encourage family members to love and reach out to their gay family members, regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." ^[26]

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" ^[27]

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.^[28] One woman with a lesbian sister wrote an Ensign article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh).

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." ^[29]

The Church helps gay people find peace

The mission of the Church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our brothers and sisters. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our brothers and sisters, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."^[30]

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. We believe our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting gay people who chose not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." ^[31]

There are many gay members of the Church who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches gay people to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."^[32]

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both gay and straight members of the Church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

The Church helps gay people by empowering them

We believe that this peace can come through obeying the gospel of Jesus Christ. We believe all people are capable of obeying the commandments of God.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told they are incapable of obeying the commandments of God. This limits their capabilities and prevents them from obtaining the peace that comes through obedience. By ensuring people that they are capable of obedience, we empower to make their own decision. This enables them to chose whether or not to obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that gay people are incapable of abstaining from same-sex relationships, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that gay people are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that for gay people "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex." This choice, according to the court, is one "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth".^[33] They leave no room for a gay person to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which by extension implies that gay people were born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to gay people. They may come to believe that the have no power over their sexual urges, and the only choice is to act on them. Those who do not want to pursue same-sex relationships are told that option is not available to them. This can cause them to feel trapped and bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a gay person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.^[34] The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help gay clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even in this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.^[35]

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concience (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If a gay person is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, they they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

God Loveth His Children affirms that gay people do have a choice and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."^[36]

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

Much of this argument is based under the assumption that the Church is true, and that same-sex relationships are against the will of the Lord. Whether one agrees with that premise or not, that is the assumption that we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Our intentions are 100% pro-gay. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".^[37]

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.^[38] We are a welcoming and affirming church for our gay brothers and sisters.

Endnotes

1. [retour]  (2009), Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation off-site
2. [retour]  In re MARRIAGE CASES
3. [retour] “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,” Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
4. [retour]  New Horizons
5. [retour]  Evergreen International Resources for Individuals
6. [retour]  - Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction - LDS Newsroom
7. [retour] Hinckley, Gordon B., (1987), Reverence and Morality off-site
8. [retour]  1998 What Are People Asking about Us? Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
9. [retour] Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). Why We Do Some of the Things We Do. Ensign.
10. [retour]  (2004), A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints off-site
11. [retour] Holland, Jeffrey R., (2007), Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction off-site
12. [retour]  LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state
13. [retour] Kimball, Spencer W., (1969), The Miracle of Forgiveness Bookcraft
14. [retour] Kimball, Spencer W., (1971), New Horizons for Homosexuals LDS Church off-site .
15. [retour]  (1992), Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders , Salt Lake City, Utah: LDS Church off-site .
16. [retour]  (1995), The Family: A Proclamation to the World , Salt Lake City, Utah: LDS Church .
17. [retour] God Loveth His Children, off-site
18. [retour]  Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances
19. [retour] Lattin, Don, (1997), Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley off-site
20. [retour]  (2004), In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction Deseret Book off-site .
21. [retour]  In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America off-site Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled.
22. [retour]  1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement, Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
23. [retour] Wickman, Lance B., (2007), Same-Gender Attraction , Salt Lake City, Utah: LDS Church off-site
24. [retour]  Packer Ye Are the Temple of God
25. [retour] A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.
26. [retour] For example, see Becoming Whole Again and My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction
27. [retour]  There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see Beckstead, A. Lee , "Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy", The Counseling Psychologist 651–690 Throckmorton, Warren , "Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy", {{{journal}}} 332–42 and Haldeman, Douglas (2004), "When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients", The Counseling Psychologist 691. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[39] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]