Difference between revisions of "Question: How do Mormons view the issue of heterosexual marriage for people with same-sex attraction?"

(Marriage as therapy)
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The Church encourages all of its members to be open and honest with their spouse.  In particular, they have discouraged members with same-sex attraction from using marriage as personal therapy or from lying in order to get married.  However, they have said marriage can be appropriate in certain situations.  Elder Oaks stated:
Elder Oaks stated:
 
  
 
:"We are sometimes asked about whether marriage is a remedy for these feelings that we have been talking about. President Hinckley, faced with the fact that apparently some had believed it to be a remedy, and perhaps that some Church leaders had even counseled marriage as the remedy for these feelings, made this statement: “Marriage should not be viewed as a therapeutic step to solve problems such as homosexual inclinations or practices.” To me that means that we are not going to stand still to put at risk daughters of God who would enter into such marriages under false pretenses or under a cloud unknown to them. Persons who have this kind of challenge that they cannot control could not enter marriage in good faith. (See [[Mormonism and gender issues/Same-sex attraction/Marriage as therapy|Same-sex attraction/Marriage as therapy]])
 
:"We are sometimes asked about whether marriage is a remedy for these feelings that we have been talking about. President Hinckley, faced with the fact that apparently some had believed it to be a remedy, and perhaps that some Church leaders had even counseled marriage as the remedy for these feelings, made this statement: “Marriage should not be viewed as a therapeutic step to solve problems such as homosexual inclinations or practices.” To me that means that we are not going to stand still to put at risk daughters of God who would enter into such marriages under false pretenses or under a cloud unknown to them. Persons who have this kind of challenge that they cannot control could not enter marriage in good faith. (See [[Mormonism and gender issues/Same-sex attraction/Marriage as therapy|Same-sex attraction/Marriage as therapy]])
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:President Hinckley said that marriage is not a therapeutic step to solve problems."[http://newsroom.lds.org/official-statement/same-gender-attraction]
 
:President Hinckley said that marriage is not a therapeutic step to solve problems."[http://newsroom.lds.org/official-statement/same-gender-attraction]
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Some critics have argued that by failing to prohibit people with same-sex attraction from ever having any companionship, the Church sets up its members for failure and heart-ache.
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=== Resilient Factors ===
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Marriages where one spouse is attracted to the same sex are more prone to divorce and dissatisfaction.  The Church does not recommend marriage in all cases.  For example, the Church recommends being open and honest with a spouse before marriage.  Research by Buxton found that if a man with same-sex attraction were to enter a marriage without disclosing their attractions, the marriage had a 85% chance of failure within three years after the sexual attractions were discovered. (Need ref)
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Most often, the couple choose not to stay together after the disclosure.  However, for those who did try to make their marriages work, they found relatively high success rates after being open and honest.  The study concluded:
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“The significant finding is that about half of those who tried to make their marriages work succeeded, an important figure for couples who are dismayed by the fifteen percent figure to keep in mind. This low figure is based on all marriages where the husband came out.”
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On the other hand, research by Kays found that open and honest communication lead to higher rates of stability and satisfaction in marriage.  They found that some of the couples  "report having a highly satisfying and stable relationship, similar to that of heterosexual marriages."[http://www.informaworld.com/smpp/content~content=a923933982~db=all~jumptype=rss]
  
 
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Revision as of 22:16, 27 April 2011

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This article is a draft. FairMormon editors are currently editing it. We welcome your suggestions on improving the content.

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Questions

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  • What is the Church's position on marriage for people with same-sex attraction?
  • How does this correspond with modern research?
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Detailed Analysis

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 [needs work]

The Church encourages all of its members to be open and honest with their spouse. In particular, they have discouraged members with same-sex attraction from using marriage as personal therapy or from lying in order to get married. However, they have said marriage can be appropriate in certain situations. Elder Oaks stated:

"We are sometimes asked about whether marriage is a remedy for these feelings that we have been talking about. President Hinckley, faced with the fact that apparently some had believed it to be a remedy, and perhaps that some Church leaders had even counseled marriage as the remedy for these feelings, made this statement: “Marriage should not be viewed as a therapeutic step to solve problems such as homosexual inclinations or practices.” To me that means that we are not going to stand still to put at risk daughters of God who would enter into such marriages under false pretenses or under a cloud unknown to them. Persons who have this kind of challenge that they cannot control could not enter marriage in good faith. (See Same-sex attraction/Marriage as therapy)
On the other hand, persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity — that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate.
President Hinckley said that marriage is not a therapeutic step to solve problems."[1]

Some critics have argued that by failing to prohibit people with same-sex attraction from ever having any companionship, the Church sets up its members for failure and heart-ache.

Resilient Factors

Marriages where one spouse is attracted to the same sex are more prone to divorce and dissatisfaction. The Church does not recommend marriage in all cases. For example, the Church recommends being open and honest with a spouse before marriage. Research by Buxton found that if a man with same-sex attraction were to enter a marriage without disclosing their attractions, the marriage had a 85% chance of failure within three years after the sexual attractions were discovered. (Need ref)

Most often, the couple choose not to stay together after the disclosure. However, for those who did try to make their marriages work, they found relatively high success rates after being open and honest. The study concluded:

“The significant finding is that about half of those who tried to make their marriages work succeeded, an important figure for couples who are dismayed by the fifteen percent figure to keep in mind. This low figure is based on all marriages where the husband came out.”

On the other hand, research by Kays found that open and honest communication lead to higher rates of stability and satisfaction in marriage. They found that some of the couples "report having a highly satisfying and stable relationship, similar to that of heterosexual marriages."[2]

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Answer

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Text  [needs work]

== Notes == None

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